Monday, 2 April 2012

Doesn't Time Fly!

Good God, where has all the time gone??

I feel a bit bad, not having updated my blog for a few weeks, but it’s OK,it’s only momentary and I’m over it already.
From what I can remember, the rest of the radiotherapy went pretty much without a hitch, apart from delays with machines and general stuff. The staff in oncology are really lovely. They all have plenty of time for you, even if they are busy, they make time to listen and help you with a smile.
Ady and I both agreed that they put some nursing staff on general wards to shame.
Towards the end of his treatment, Ady was starting to enjoy the cumulative effects of his radiotherapy. He cant go for more than about an hour without needing a wee, and when his body says “Piss!”, then he has to go straight away...running....there is no warning system in place!
A couple of weeks ago, right at the last few days of radiotherapy, one evening, he thought,” Hmm, I think I need a, actually, it’s a, a, no, I am sure it’s just a wee” He went upstairs for a wee, pulled his trousers down and promptly shat all over the floor!
Thank the good Lord that I was out that evening, enjoying time with my friends for her birthday, so he had to clear it up himself.
Things got a bit dire that weekend and poor Ady was shitting and pissing everywhere. It really got him down actually and we thought, “Christ, is this what it is going to be like?..Have they blasted his arse away completely?” Which was the concern of the oncologist because of his previous bowel surgery.
I rang our lovely district nurse and told her of our problems. Bless her, she was straight round, doing an incontinence assessment, and fast tracked Ady for some incontinence pads.
She did say that we were the most amusing couple she had assessed cos we were just laughing about it while Ady was running to the loo every ten minutes and then coming down stairs saying “Christ Marnie, I don’t know if it’s my pisser or my shitter next, and I can’t hold onto anything. This just isn’t normal or natural” and then each time he ran to the loo, he would be saying “This isn’t natural ya know”
Marnie saved our day and some nice decent sized piss/shit pads arrived a few days later.
Things have calmed down a lot in that department now although he still gets no warning for a wee, and about a 30 second warning for a poo. He is also up between three and five times a night for a wee, so he is knackered during the day.
When he does go for a poo, he thinks he is going to do a great big wopping one, and all he does is a Barbie poop..this happens about five times a day. Needless to say, it has made him quite sore but lovely Geriant (our macmillan man) gave him some foam to squirt up there.
Ady and I agreed that he has had everything else shoved up there and a bit of foam might be a pleasant change. Poor Geriant just didn’t know how to our basic humour.
Let’s move on to the hormones. Oh...Dear....God.....there was me, being very hopeful that he would be multitasking by the end of the week, how wrong was I !!
He starts saying something and mid way, he completely loses track of what he was saying and then asks me what he was saying, so now, horror of horrors, I actually have to listen to him every time he speaks. I can’t get away with saying “Oh yes” and “Uh huh” to make it sound like I am listening *sigh*
He has become a bit hormonal too and has to check with me to see if I think he is being a bit oversensitive at times.
The girls think it’s great cos when he says “No” to something they want, they just say “But you said we could earlier” and he says “Did I”?...little buggers lol.

Ady summed himself up perfectly when he was speaking to my brother in law when he asked how the hormones were going and his reply was “Well Andy, I’m just like a woman, I can’t do fuck all all day cos I’m knackered”
I did suggest to Ady that I should take on the male role and demand rampant sex all night and then sulk cos he is too tired, has a headache and his hormones have taken his libido away.
Strangely, that didn’t go down to well, but I found it very amusing indeed.

When the end of radiotherapy came, we got all the staff some boxes of biscuits to thank them for everything they do. Ady said he felt very odd, not going back there again, and felt a bit , oh what’s the word....erm...vulnerable I spose,in a way, cos suddenly, he wasn’t seeing anyone medical who would ask how he was. Even the receptionists would ask how we both were every day, but we have been told to ring if we are worried, and they are phoning on Wednesday to chat to Ady.
He doesn’t feel like that now cos he is used to not going there now but towards the end, I had to stop some of my work cos it was just too flipping stressful worrying about whether I was going to get back in time or if I was going to be late and let everyone down, so I just didn’t go in at all. That was SO much better!
Of course, cutting down on my hours have us some time together in the afternoons on the allotment. Ady would come home and have a sleep while I did some housework and cooked dinner, and then we would go and potter.
This was much better cos he was rarely left on his own to get too deep in thought and it gave us some nice time together.
We needed to build a fruit cage and as Ady is very friendly with the guys at the fencing place, and they know his situation, they gave us a load of great big long steak things that were not really good enough to sell, but good enough for what we wanted, and they delivered them all for free!
When Ady was working, he used to do quite a bit of fencing, and he has one of those bloody heavy post rammer inners. I thought to myself “Bloody marvellous, he will ram those in within five minutes with that”
Well, we only had one of those white plastic garden chairs to stand on so I said “Dont worry, I will hold it steady while you stand on it and thump the posts in”
He got half way through with the first one before his started looking a bit white and then said “Here you are, you have a go”
Bloody hell, I could hardly lift the thumper!
It took me a good part of the afternoon, balancing on the chair ramming all six posts in. I was blooming knackered and the cheeky bugger tells everyone that HE made me a fruit cage!! I don’t jolly well think so! It must be his hormones making him think funny.

Right, that’s it for the moment cos otherwise this little bloggette will be too long and get boring, if you are not bored already.
In my next one, I will tell you all about Julia and the DWP.


  1. So glad you are "back " and sense of humour still in place! I can't stand a messy kitchen never mind toilet disasters.... How do you do it?. Love the comment about how you have to listen to him now ;-). Happy Easter to you all.

  2. Good to hear from again, I have a look every now and again.
    I have a family member who works in Radiotherapy, so it is interesting to hear from the other side of the fence, so to speak.
    Nowhere near you of course.

    Best wishes.

  3. if it helps, that is exactly what my father went through too... although he chose to build a stable rather than a fruit cage!