Ady.

I am going to try and get a couple of weeks worth in this blog, but I might have so split in into two...I will see how I get on.

So, there I was, one morning a couple of weeks ago, sitting having my morning cup of coffee and fag, deep in my own thoughts before everyone else got up for the day. I really hate it when I am woken up abruptly and immediate demands are put on me. That just pisses my whole day off, so I like half an hour of peace first.

Anyway, there I was and it was lovely and peaceful. The next minute, there was an almighty crash. I thought, bloody hell, that sounds like a wardrobe or book case has crashed onto the floor.

Then I thought, hmm, we dont have a book case upstairs and the wardrobes are nailed to the walls. Immediate panic set in. Christ, it must be Ady then!

Then I thought, bloody hell, there is no noise, no “Ouch” or anything! Perhaps he has passed out or something..and I raced upstairs.

Well, yes, there was Ady, sprawled across the bedroom floor.

“Morning darling” he said

‘He seems alright then’ I thought so I said “What the bloody hell are you doing?” (does the question mark go before the speech mark or after, I can never remember)anyway,

He said “Well, I was getting out of bed and I got my toe caught in that bit of begging on the floor there. I just couldn’t stop myself from going down like a sack of shit and I nearly smacked my head on the mantel piece”

I was nice and checked that he hadn’t REALLY hurt himself or broken anything, but he had walloped his elbow and his knee, so I helped him up.

That’s right, it was the morning of the CT scan cos our neighbour sent a text at hospital asking if everything was OK cos she heard it!

As I helped him up, he said “See, I told you I was stiff in the mornings”

I said “Yeah, but you are stiff in all the wrong bloody places now up you get!”

On the Saturday evening, we had friends around for the evening and Ady was telling them about his fall. We were having a laugh and a joke about it, as you do, they are a great bunch of friends with wicked senses of humour. One time, I had a backwards dinner party where you started with coffee and mints, cheese and biscuits, then sweet, then main and then the starter...Dave, the cheeky bugger, turned up with an empty bottle of wine.

Anyway, I digress. Ady told them that if I was at work that morning, he would have had to wait on the floor until I came home to help him up cos he couldn’t get up himself.

I thought bloody hell, I really wonder if he realises how bad that is...I dont think he does really.

I will do the second part in a separate blog cos I am a celeb is on !!