I managed to talk three men into going to London to be on ITV’s This Morning to have their prostates checked. Considering men are completely useless at going to their GP to get their big toe checked, let alone their prostate, I was pretty chuffed with myself, and them!
The men were my brother Chris, my Brother in Law Andy and their friend, erm...he doesn’t really want to be identified, so let’s call him Dave.
Now, as I wasn’t there myself, I am telling you what they told me, so this could go anywhere....
They had to leave about 7ish to get to the South Bank for 8.30.
I sent Andy and Chris a text (I didn’t have Dave’s number) to say to have a great time. Andy sent one back saying that he was desperate for a shit, and Chris sent one back saying he hoped they didn’t mind that he hadn’t had a shit for a week. Chris had a skiing accident a few years ago and he doesn’t mind me telling you that he seems to have lost muscle contractions where his bowels are concerned and his peeing problems are masking any prostate problems he could have.
They got to the ITV place on the South Bank and signed themselves in at reception. They were told that they could have breakfast in the canteen, so off they went up in the lift with that lady who does the weather with her hair in a bob...I’ve forgotten her name, but anyway, her. They saw Bradley Walsh and Christina Blakeley in the canteen getting their breakfast too.
There were other ‘prostate men’ having breakfast and they all generally chatted and nervously giggled about it all.
They were put into groups which my brother seemed to have his name in all three, and off they all went. I am not sure what the whole group thing was about and from what I can gather, no one else seemed to know either, not even the organisers!
Chris said that the whole morning was a bit like laying a road while you were driving along it....
As they got outside, there was Dr Chris, Paul Ross (who was apparently a very nice bloke) and Jason Gardiner. My brother went up to them as they were standing there, shook Paul Ross’ hand and asked if they were here for the prostate check.
Paul Ross just laughed and Jason Gardiner seemed absolutely horrified...really put out... that Chris didn’t recognise who he was. Andy nudged Chris and said “Chris, that is Paul Ross, the Dancing on Ice bloke and the TV doctor...they are all famous”
“Oh well” Chris said, “Well how was I supposed to know that..never mind” and they went off and mixed with everyone else.
The programme went on air and they did a lot of standing around in the queue. Chris was standing next to Paul Ross, then Andy in disguise with his sunglasses and Movember moustache and Dave looking in completely the opposite direction as the camera came across...typical !
I thought Dr Chris was very disappointing when he said that Prostate cancer generally affects older men and what a slow growing disease it is. He clearly hadn’t done his homework, whereas Holly and Phil certainly had and asked the right questions.
I totally take my hat off to Paul Ross for having a DRE (Digital Rectal Examination) live on the show...as well as being a nice bloke in real life, he is a top man!
At the end of the prostate part of the show, one of the people organising the whole thing said to everyone that things didn’t quite go according to plan as no one actually had a DRE, but the Harley Street Urologist was happy to speak to anyone or check men if they wanted to. Or they were free to go.
Dave said that he had never seen the place clear so quickly as most of the men ran off!
The three men were standing there wondering what to do and talking about the fact that they had made the effort to go to London, they had clean pants on and that it would be a waste to just go home without even chatting to the urologist at least.
Dave and Andy turned to Chris to see what he wanted to do, and realised that he was already in there chatting the urologist!
Dave and Andy went off to find him and Dave decided that he would have his checked as he had prepared himself for it.
The Urologist agreed and pointed Dave in the direction of a three sided dome tent pitched on the South Bank! It had one of those green material screen things in front.
Poor Dave was HORRIFIED, but felt that he couldn’t back out now so went into the tent and dropped his trousers while the general public walked on by.
While he was lying on the bed, the wind started blowing, making the material in the green screen thing flap so passersby could see through and as he looked up, there was a big gap between the screen and the roof of the tent. He realised to his horror, that everyone in the canteen upstairs where they had been that morning, could all see RIGHT into the tent!
He had the DRE and is actually very glad he did, because the urologist told him that his prostate is slightly enlarged, so he will having further investigations. The urologist also told him that it didn’t feel cancerous, but it is always good to get these things checked! Dave is in his forties.
Chris was in a rush to get to Ireland on business, so he didn’t stop for a DRE but I think he will be getting one done when he gets back to England.
Andy, felt that he had done his bit with his Movember moustache. He had a chat with the urologist and decided that he would pass on the DRE....wimp!
In all, the men said that they had a great day out. They met some brilliant people and had a good laugh.
Thank you Andy, Chris and Dave. Three bloody good blokes who took the morning off work, travelled to London with the thought of getting a finger up the bum, stood around all morning and came home. And all done in support of Ady. J