I was a bit miffed at the nurse on the phone. I know they are busy, but they should at least pretend that they are bothered.
Ady has felt a bit left on his own to get on with it. He went into hospital, came out 24 hours later armed with bags and a piece of paper about catheter care, but nothing with any substance and the NHS direct number on it, and that’s it. We are just sort of on our own with it all.
Ady said that he thinks it would be nice just for someone from the medical profession to check how he is doing..they did when he had the bowel cancer, they just rang to ask if everything was OK. I often wonder and worry how people 20 years older manage with this stuff.
Anyway, this evening, everything was as normal and then Ady called me from upstairs. He said he had a pain in his willy and belly, and he was pissing everywhere and nothing was going in his bag.
“No problem”, I said, “You have a blockage” . I put lots of towels on the bed and got him to lie flat and drink, drink and drink some more. “We need to flush it through” I said
After a little while, Ady said “Bollocks to this, I think I need to go to the hospital” nothing was going into his bag.
The consultant told us that if we had any problems, then we were to go straight to Maidstone A&E, cos that is where urology is, and no other hospital. So I rang Maidstone and the lady put me through to the on call duty urologisty person. He was very nice. I explained all the problems and he said that he needed to see him. I said we would be there in an hour and he said he would look up Ady’s notes and would be waiting for us. Great,I thought.
We sorted the girls to be looked after by Ady’s brother, who came over straight away, I padded Ady up with a load of incontinence pads cos I didn’t want him pissing in my car and I was pleased that I had managed to keep piss off my bed. I grabbed all his prostate notes ( I have one set for prostate cancer, one for bowel cancer, one for his bones and one for miscellaneous illnesses) and off we went.
We arrived at Maidstone within the hour and I booked Ady in with the receptionist. I told her that I had spoken to a lovely man who said he would be waiting for us. She asked his name and I told her that I didn’t manage to catch it, but it had lots of ‘A’s,’Y’s,’M’s and ‘H’s in it. She was none the wiser but said she would bleep the on call urologist.
We took our seats amongst the sick and injured, well, I think they were anyway, but I suspect half of them had turned up to watch the free telly on the wall because they seemed very able bodied to me. Some had a limp or were holding an arm, but you could tell that they were exaggerating their pain...something I would never do !
After a while, I asked the receptionist if she had found him. She said a nurse would be calling us shortly. Well, true to her word, the nurse called us into a room. She told us that the Urologist had gone home. Me and Ady looked at each other and chimed “Are you having a laugh? Gone home??” I actually wondered if he had looked at Ady’s notes and it said something like ‘miserable wife that moaned to the PCT about hospital choice – steer clear’
I said that he said he would be here, waiting for us and we were here within the hour, why has he gone home?
She apologised and said that we could go and wait in ‘majors’ because there were only two people in front of us whereas in ‘minors’ there were 17.
She took us around to majors and there we sat, and we waited, and we sat some more.
Ady then quietly said to me...”Em, I think my bag is filling up”...this should have been a happy moment, but I thought to myself FFS, it bloody would now, wouldn’t it !
He went off to empty his bag and came back to tell me there was a bit of debris from his bladder in it. “Great” I said, “That was what was causing the blockage, at least we know” we sat for a little while longer to make sure things were back to normal.
We then agreed that it was a bit pointless seeing anyone now, so I went to tell the nurse that we were off home. He asked me why we were here, and I explained which operation he had had and what the problem was. He asked to just check Ady over before we went, to make sure it was not a blood clot causing the blockage.
The nurse was lovely and said all was fine. I grabbed the opportunity while we were there, to ask for some more catheter bags to take home. He sent another nurse to a store cupboard to get them and we had to sit in the corridor and wait.
Well, blow me down, while we were waiting, the urologisty man came up to us. He hadn’t gone home at all, but had to pop to Canterbury ! (hospital I assume)
He had a good chat with us and said that we were right to come to the hospital. He took some copys of Ady notes I had brought and said he would also chase up the appointment to have the catheter removed and would ring me tomorrow. Ady said “You had better have the wife’s mobile number cos she will only want to know what you have said and I wont have a clue, I am just the patient, she is in charge”. The urlolgisty man laughed and agreed that he should concentrate on being the patient and I should concentrate on the rest.
Ady has always said that he is the better one to get the cancer, and I am the better one to do the sorting and organising. He is a very stoic and well behaved patient, much better than I would ever be.
One way or another, we will get this bloody appointment !!!!
One day, we might get our benefit money too, rapid reclaim my arse!
Oh yes, and one more thing, we were told that once the histology is in from the prostate, we will get an appointment to see the consultant to find out if it has spread and if any other treatment will be needed. This will be 2 to 3 weeks after surgery.
The letter came today. The appointment is for 17th October. That’s right, FIVE weeks to wait...Well,I don’t bloody well think so !!!
We are Emma, Ady Charlotte and Stephanie and we live at